We're the Only Ones Tearful Enough

Orange County Court Judge Robert Freehill said he was torn about what punishment best fit Heatherine Tomlinson's crimes yesterday, but in the end, he heeded her tearful plea for mercy.

Freehill sentenced the former county correction officer to five years' probation for the felonies that got her fired: Identity theft, possession of stolen property and five counts of forgery, all arising from Tomlinson's December 2006 booze-buying spree with someone else's credit card. She found the card at an ATM.

Thanks, Judge Bob. I'm sure you'll have plenty of mercy left over if any non-"Only One" comes before you charged with the heinous crime of possessing the means of unlicensed self defense. Just let us know how hard you want them to cry.

[Via Declan]