Friday, May 09, 2008

We're the Only Ones Private Enough

A Chicago neighborhood faced with crime is taking an extra step to keep residents safe.

A private security firm patrols the streets of Marquette Park, in addition to the Chicago Police Dept.
Private "Only Ones"? You mean all the King's horses and all the King's men aren't enough? Even in battle mode?

What the hell are Chicagoans getting for all that protection money Boss Daley's racketeers are shaking them down for?

Oh--you'll just tax 'em some more? And turn it over to the Lithuanian Human Services Community Center? So now "Marquette Park residents [can] say they feel safer"?

Hey, how 'bout passing some along to us Romanians? We impale our enemies on stakes and leave 'em there as picnic decorations, and you never saw a safer neighborhood!

[Via HZ]

3 comments:

  1. Hey, how 'bout passing some along to us Romanians? We impale our enemies on stakes and leave 'em there as picnic decorations, and you never saw a safer neighborhood!

    Dammit, David! I just coughed chicken casserole all over my computer screen.

    Man, but that's funny!

    ReplyDelete
  2. This is a way around the Chicago gun ban. Everybody become a one-man security firm.

    Joe Doakes dba JDSecurity, then hire yourself to provide security.

    Or incorporate if you must in the wife's name have her hire you for security.

    Or hire the local drug gang to provide security. Their pay commensurate with the drop in crime and its sustainability. Oh, wait, they aready have that and it isn't working, they're called The Chicago PD.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Vlad Tepes also had the hats of two Turkish emissaries nailed to their skulls when they did not remove them as a sign of courtesy because it was not THEIR custom. When in Romania...

    ReplyDelete

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