Thursday, October 19, 2006

Something's Rotten in Hackensack

One of Mayor Michael Bloomberg's personal employees was beaten by a thief who then stole the billionaire's car in New Jersey, authorities said.

The employee was driving the gray 2001 Lexus Wednesday morning in Hackensack, New Jersey, on an errand for the mayor shortly before 9 a.m. when a woman came to the window to ask for money, police said. As he declined and began to roll up the window, a man got into the passenger seat and punched him in the face, authorities said.

Uh...doesn't a 2001 Lexus have automatic safety door locks that activate whenever it's being driven?

I'm trying to think of a reason one would stop and have the window rolled down near a streetwalking woman. Come to think of it, the AP reports "a woman came to the window" as though it were an accepted fact, rather than the aide's story. But it was a man who got in the (volitionally?) unlocked car door.

Not that I'm the suspicious type, so I'll take the easy way out and repeat the irony stated by others that, had he been armed, he could have protected both himself and the car, had being armed been legal he would have faced no repercussions, and if the billionaire mayor was such a great humanitarian, his employees ought to have a few dollars to spread around to the needy when they rub elbows with the hoi polloi...

Nah, I like my first fantasy scenario better...

[Via SayUncle]

3 comments:

E. David Quammen said...

"Nah, I like my first fantasy scenario better..."

So do I. For, on its face, it appears to be far more close to what the actual facts probably are.

Anonymous said...

I told you it was an illegal auto brought into Hackensack to commit crime. Investigations, arrests and lawsuits of the owner of record of this illegal auto are called for.

Even Mayor Bloomberg couldn't disagree, after all that tactic was his idea. Hope he likes his new husband in the pen.

Anonymous said...

sounds to me like "fantasy #1" is closer to the truth. i'd bet her first words were "hi honey, wanna party..." and like a typical liberal idiot he popped the right hand door lock, and the rest followed in its natural course. in the immortal words of bugs bunny, "what a maroon!"