A proposed law currently making its way through the Florida legislature might help you with what can be an embarrassing problem. Here's the bottom line, the bill would be a mandate that all eating establishment must have enough toilet paper when you go into the restroom.What is it with tight-a** Republicans and their idiotic repressive edicts lately?
...State Senator Victor Crist, a Republican from Tampa, felt the problem was so important, a law must be passed to protect the backsides of anyone in Florida.
Don't these morons know the only thing supposedly distinguishing them from democrats is...uh...crap like this? The market can't handle this without The Law coming down from On High? But I guess by now we've seen so many of them abuse the Constitution like toilet paper that nothing should surprise us anymore.
Not that I'm calling for it, but the thought just struck: It'd be funny if somebody TP'd this a**wipe's house, wouldn't it? That enough toilet paper for ya there, Victor?
4 comments:
Not a problem. The people can just wipe their ass with the Constitution, just like their masters in the legislature.
Right now the Connecticut legislature is worried about plastic bags and bottled water. Meanwhile, they can't even perform their basic duties and finish fixing a state-owned bridge in town. (The rusty, unused power-shovel sitting on our dilapidated bridge would play nicely against a Monument to Socialism like this, in a photograph.)
Markie Marxist sez: "Cool! If we can mandate toilet paper, we can mandate anything. Twinkies, and paperclips, and pencils where the lead doesn't break off, and stuff. Anything! The sky's the limit! Like a single payer system of commerce where all payments, and I do mean *all payments*, are routed through the government. Even when you buy toilet paper! Ha! Ha! We own this country!"
But when you think how happy he would be in the end, how could you deny him?
After all the job isn't complete until the paperwork is done. This ass really needs it.
This is way off-topic ... but maybe not.
I actually saw The Ventures perform in the Mid_eighties. They were doing bar-gigs, old and slow, and they came to my city to perform in the bar of my favorite Chinese restaurant.
They played all their old favorites ("Telstar" was a real drag), but when it came to "Wipe Out" they woke up and found the energy. They were having fun, we were too, and people actually got up and danced to the music!
My wife and I danced to that, and to everything else they played (thankfully, TeleStar came earlier in the gig ... who can dance to that?) At the end of the show we went up to talk to them. We bought the album ( in LP ) and they all did the magic-marker thing.
I don't have the wife, I don't have the Ventures tour ... but I still have the autographed album.
It's a sad nation that doesn't revere its icons. Thankfully, America never forgets.
Except, of course, for the Morning After.
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